“Perhaps you’d like to know a secret, one of the happiest ones of all… The Secret.. presents the essence of being gratefully present in life as Greg Woods explores and traces contact with the world of nature and family. My favorite lines are:
“The heart that gives thanks is a happy one, for we can not feel thankful and be unhappy at the same time.” and the secret: “We don’t give thanks because we’re happy. We are happy because we give thanks.”

These conclusions provide both adults and children with the opportunity to deepen their understanding of gratitude. It takes us all beyond superficial Thank yous into an exploration of our negative emotions, wants and cravings. It challenges us to confront and let go of our demands and disatisfactions. Can we find the resources to be appreciative and grateful when things do not go our way and our wishes are denied?

When I read this to kids I like to contrast being thankful with a picture of a child begging her Mom to buy her candy in a store. Then we work on what she could feel thankful for and we talk about feeling the opposite of thankful or unthankful. It seems to help children connect with how to put their minor wants into perspective and to identify and feel grateful for the more important things in their lives. This process takes them deeper into understanding what it means to be thankful twelve months of the year and teaches them how to accept the “no”s gracefully.

Elayne Hunter

Positive Psychology Coaching – Putting the Science of Happiness to Work for Your Clients by Robert Biswas-Diener & Ben Dean

A Review in Progress by Linda Lawless LMHC LMFT
www.ProfessionalPracticeInstitute.com

Many of us have already been using Positive Psychology in our therapy and coaching work. I believe this new book will help you put things in a clear context of what to use and why.

I am finding this new book very easy to read and organized well. The first chapter is really an overview of what and why the book is about. I’m eager to move on to the next chapter. Here is an overview of the overview, using quotes from the chapter.

“This book describes ….the many ways in which positive psychology can inform coaching practices of all kinds.” (p. 2)

“… coaching is about harnessing the best in people and inspiring them to live out their potential.” (Pg. 2)

“… challenging folks to tap their inner abundance.” (3)

There is a discussion of the field of coaching and a determination that coaching has been around for decades, yet is really in its professional infancy in terms of theoretical coherence. They believe “the discipline needs to grow through the development of explicitly defined theories of human development and research on coaching effectiveness.” (Pg 4)

They are proposing the new field of positive psychology as a branch of science that “shows tremendous potential as a natural interface with the profession of coaching.. It is grounded in sophisticated scientific methodology,… as an applied science…” (Pg 5)

They have identified three areas in which coaches can easily employ science: 1 – Survey readings of relevant background material, i.e., A. Maslow and R. Quinn; 2 – Using well-validated measurement tools; 3 – Research to provide a basis for evaluating interventions.

They encourage coaches to continually evolve their own theories of change and human nature and to keep asking the question “What is the best way to help clients achieve their goals?” (Pg. 10)

Now on to Positive Psychology. “Seligman made the bold claim that psychology, in its present form, was really only half a discipline.” (Pg. 11) “Positive psychology is psychology’s answer to the other crucial question: “What is going right with people?”

The value of happiness is explored with some amazing data. “…happy people make more money, take fewer sick days from work, get along with their colleagues better, spend more time volunteering, are more likely to help strangers, receive better supervisor evaluations on the job, are rated more highly by customers, and exhibit less work turnover than less happy individuals.”

The book is structured into parts I, II and III.
I – Foundation I: Happiness and Positivity; II The development and use of character strengths and virtues; Part III The application of positive psychology coaching to the workplace. This chapter gives an overview of each part and I’ll skip that part and review each section in detail as they unfold.

Special Topics in Positive Psychology Coaching: They discuss the differences in how people approach their work or job, there are those to dislike or dread their work and are motivated only by their paycheck; others who enjoy aspects of their job but see it only as a stepping stone to other benefits; and finally those who “feel that they are in a calling, spontaneously modify their work to make it feel more meaningful.” (Pg. 21) The last approach resonates with how I feel about Positive Psychology. It is a calling and I may even be becoming evangelistically about it. Now where’s that soapbox?

On to the next chapter. Please take a look at this great book, and let me hear what it brings up for you. I’ll be posting another chapter this month or before.

Onward
Linda

If you’d like a simple, useful book to recommend as an introduction to the concepts of positive psychology for your clients, I’d highly recommend “What’s Right with You?” by Barry Duncan, PsyD.  You may recognize Barry Duncan as one of the authors of “The Heroic Client”.   In this straight-forward book, Duncan describes his frustration as a young psychologist to find out that the mental health field was only interested in what was wrong with people…their pathology.    It characterized people as damaged goods, hopeless victims of past trauma or their own biochemistry. Duncan reports that this “view” did not fit with what he experienced as he met with clients each and every day. He states, “Over the years I was delighted to discover that this pervasive attitude didn’t fit the scientific research about change either.   Change, in truth, is far more about what is right with people attempting it…their strengths, resources, ideas and relational support-than the labels they are branded with or the methods therapists use.”

The client is the bottom line of change.   Change happens by marshaling your inherent abilities, “what’s right with you”, to address the situation at hand. In the drama of change, it is the client who is the hero or heroine. “This book translates this central finding and others from scientific research into easy, practical steps to make meaningful change in your life.” (Duncan)

Using scientific research collected over years about what really happens when people with problems approach change, Duncan reports that 40% of change comes from the clients preexisting strengths, etc. , 30% comes from relational support, 15% from your approach to change and 15% from your hopes and expectations. This is an incredibly empowering message for people seeking to better their situation.

Research consistently shows that change in therapy does not come about from the special powers or authority of any particular physcian or therapist. There are no sages or miracle cures. “Change principally results from empowering your preexisting abilities and restoring hope.”

Duncan is concerned with the message that is delivered and embraced in the American culture or increasingly around the world is that basically we are sick and getting sicker. He calls it the killer “D’s”….Diseases, Disorders, Dysfunctions, Deficits, & Disabilities. Much of this emphasis comes from the powerful drug companies who have a vested interest in having us believe that we are helpless victims of our past traumas and biology. Buying into this distorted message diminishes our innate propensities to help ourselves.

“Unhappiness is no longer thought to be shaped by such diverse forces as a sedentary, lonely or impoverished life; the loss of love, health or community; “learned helplessness” or feelings of powerlessness arising from unsatisfying work or abusive relationship. It’s resolution no longer requires anyone to do something different, get meaningful support from others, or for communities to address conditions or injustices that breed fear or despair. No, problems in living-our own and perhaps especially our children’s-are now publicly defined as illnesses, treatable-thank heaven-by the miracle drugs and other treatments administered by experts.” Approaching problems in life with the assumption that we are sick, flawed or broken, predisposes us to failure. “In truth, change is inevitable and decidedly human and primarily comes through the mobilization of one’s strengths and abilities.” (Duncan)

Each of the seven chapters of the book helps the client build a plan to solve real life problems. My favorite chapter is “Discovering the Hero Within”. “It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” Henry David Thoreau

There is a great deal of research that points to the importance of having a consistent, coherent narrative of oneself.  It is important that we give voice to the whole story: the confusion and the clarity, the suffering and the endurance and the pain and the coping, the desperation and the desire. We are much more empowered to step up to our challenges when we are focused of what is right with us…rather than what is wrong. We human beings are complex and complicated but whenever we are empowered to bring about mindful transformation, it is more likely to come from a place of employing our strengths and competencies!!!!

This is a empowering, inspirational yet highly practical book. I highly recommend it to you!

Bonni Akalis

Having just spent a day with Dan Siegel (The Mindful Brain) and hearing about neural plasticity, I was put off by the introduction to Chapter 3 and their belief in “biological determinism.” Realizing the authors and I come from different places, but are looking to the same outcomes, helping clients increase the happiness in their lives, I read on.

The three areas of focus are mentioned in the title of this chapter. I thought I knew a lot about goal setting and discovered a lot lot more. The power of relationships and thinking styles and habits are also thoughtfully explored. After I got over my resistance in the opening pages, I found this chapter very educational.

a mind of its own: How Your Brain Distorts And Deceives
Author: Cordeia Fine

Highly recommended by reviewer: Carole Rein

Well-researched, this book presents information supported by hundreds of studies by hundreds of researchers including Dan Wegner, Roy Baumeister, and Antonio Damasio. What sets this book apart from others is its lightheartedness in listing serious shortcomings of our brains, that is, the brains that are not learning-disabled, but considered ‘normal’. Research has shown that our brains distort facts repeatedly in order to see ourselves personally in a better light. This is a million examples of positive psychology in action, on the part of our brains!

Fine’s nine chapters focus on these brain qualities: vanity, emotions, immorality, delusion, pigheadedness, secretiveness, weak will, bigotry, and vulnerability. In the chapter on weak will, Fine describes brain mechanics and the energy drain caused by trying to control our thoughts or actions. Interestingly, learning about the mechanics doesn’t necessarily make it easier to exercise more or eat less, though may make us more understanding when we don’t stick to our next New Year’s resolutions.

Why read this book? Your awareness of brain and behavioral research will increase easily because, as we know from positive psychology, it’s easier to learn when experiencing positive emotions. a mind of its own will make you laugh and perhaps lighten up on yourself.

Why should I be happy? Once you read the research on happiness and how it improves people’s lives – I believe you’ll join me in my commitment to increasing the happiness factor in my client’s, and my own life!

The second chapter of Positive Psychology Coaching starts with the question “Am I happy?” A great existential question, and a good moment of check-in. What does happy mean to you? Does it have a place in coaching? Since most people don’t seek out the help of a therapist or coach unless the have a problem, why specialize in happiness? The second chapter takes on these hard questions in a well-organized way.

One of the things I like about how the material is covered is the boxes entitled, Point 1, Point 2, etc. The topic of happiness is well defined, existentially, subjectively and situationally. The chapter ends with action steps for positive psychology coaches.

As a teaser here is Point 1 – “Happiness is beneficial. Happy people live longer, stay married longer, make more money, receive better evaluations from work supervisors, take fewer sick days, are more altruistic, and creative.” So what do you think, feel, is happiness important?

Positive Psychology Coaching – Putting the Science of Happiness to Work for Your Clients by Robert Biswas-Diener & Ben Dean

A Review in Progress by Linda Lawless LMHC LMFT
www.ProfessionalPracticeInstitute.com

Many of us have already been using Positive Psychology in our therapy and coaching work. I believe this new book will help you put things in a clear context of what to use and why.

I am finding this new book very easy to read and well organized. The first chapter is really an overview of what the book is about and why they wrote it. Here is an overview of the overview, using quotes from the chapter.

“This book describes ….the many ways in which positive psychology can inform coaching practices of all kinds.” (p. 2)

“… coaching is about harnessing the best in people and inspiring them to live out their potential.” (Pg. 2)

“… challenging folks to tap their inner abundance.” (3)

There is a discussion of the field of coaching and a determination that coaching has been around for decades, yet is really in its professional infancy in terms of theoretical coherence. They believe “the discipline needs to grow through the development of explicitly defined theories of human development and research on coaching effectiveness.” (Pg 4)

They are proposing the new field of positive psychology as a branch of science that “shows tremendous potential as a natural interface with the profession of coaching.. It is grounded in sophisticated scientific methodology,… as an applied science…” (Pg 5)

They have identified three areas in which coaches can easily employ science: 1 – Survey readings of relevant background material, i.e., A. Maslow and R. Quinn; 2 – Using well-validated measurement tools; 3 – Research to provide a basis for evaluating interventions.

They encourage coaches to continually evolve their own theories of change and human nature and to keep asking the question “What is the best way to help clients achieve their goals?” (Pg. 10)

Now on to Positive Psychology. “Seligman made the bold claim that psychology, in its present form, was really only half a discipline.” (Pg. 11) “Positive psychology is psychology’s answer to the other crucial question: “What is going right with people?”

The value of happiness is explored with some amazing data. “…happy people make more money, take fewer sick days from work, get along with their colleagues better, spend more time volunteering, are more likely to help strangers, receive better supervisor evaluations on the job, are rated more highly by customers, and exhibit less work turnover than less happy individuals.”

The book is structured into parts I, II and III.
I – Foundation I: Happiness and Positivity; II – The development and use of character strengths and virtues; Part III -The application of positive psychology coaching to the workplace. This chapter gives an overview of each part and I’ll skip that part and review each section in detail as they unfold.

Special Topics in Positive Psychology Coaching: They discuss the differences in how people approach their work or job; there are those to dislike or dread their work and are motivated only by their paycheck; others who enjoy aspects of their job but see it only as a stepping stone to other benefits; and finally those who “feel that they are in a calling, spontaneously modify their work to make it feel more meaningful.” (Pg. 21) The last approach resonates with how I feel about Positive Psychology. It is a calling and I may even be thinking evangelistically about. Now where’s that soapbox?

Please take a look at this great book, and let me hear what it brings up for you. I’ll be posting another chapter this month or before.

Onward
Linda